It is difficult to translate between my embodied and energetic experience of feeling constantly and in relation to everything, fluctuating constellations of bodily responses to all internal and external stimuli;

And the language that has developed to classify feelings as discrete and static emotions [neurophysiological events or segments], with seemingly obscure distinctions made to enable categorisation. This model leaves gaps, doesn't refer to constellations of affect, and ignores the continuously shifting internal and external relations that these affective energies flow through.

My ecological systemic experience of affect does not fit into the dominant model of linear universalised emotional labels. For some time I thought this was a disorder, alexithymia. I was fine, good, or bad; subtleties of the language eluded me, alluding to self-deprecating deficits and developmental defects.

Now I think it is a 'mismatch of salience' (Damian Milton); a difference in experience and modelling and communication between bodies, which is introjected into autistic mindbodies as Our deficit to own and bear.

How does one usefully communicate these phenomenological abstract fluctuating constellations of feeling though?